New Years, beginnings, whatever
Oct. 9th, 2008 10:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kjpepperAs I wish my Jewish friends Shana Tova, my own head is turning to the fact that Samhain is coming up... and after that the orgy of $winterholidays. It's gonna be interesting from a news/economy perspective, the Giftmas hype, and I'm somewhat perversely looking forward to dramatic woeful reporting of the holiday belt tightening afoot. But that's neither here nor there.
It's amazingly hard to conceptualize a new beginning or an end without some sort of calendar marker to identify that time is passing. I just find it interesting that there are so many events by which to mark a cultural new beginning - New years, be they in January, February, September, October, or December. Anniversaries of things, births, deaths, major milestones... It's just kinda interesting to me that throughout the year, there are so many opportunities for renewal, with each one having their own interesting traditions...
Anyway... in terms of my own journey through the cycles, I'm realizing that I'm at a curious point in my life where things are indeed coming to ends/beginnings. I'm 30, coming down from probably one of the worst years health and sanity wise I've ever had just by itself, and I have been rather ready to be done with my 20s for a while, as though they have brought me many hard earned lessons and blessings, I also regard them as a period of loss... of focus, direction, people, aspects of myself... So this month there is a definite sense of staring ahead into the ether and going "okay... done with x, y and z... now what?" and at the same time being aware that some major chapters in my life are tying up and winding to a close, and... being okay with that in a way that I really would not have been even two weeks ago.
What's next? what is the new year, whenever it may start, going to be like? I have no idea. But I'm optimistic about it for the first time in a very long while, and that's something.
Time to take my meds and put myself to bed, I think. Shower can wait until morning.
It's amazingly hard to conceptualize a new beginning or an end without some sort of calendar marker to identify that time is passing. I just find it interesting that there are so many events by which to mark a cultural new beginning - New years, be they in January, February, September, October, or December. Anniversaries of things, births, deaths, major milestones... It's just kinda interesting to me that throughout the year, there are so many opportunities for renewal, with each one having their own interesting traditions...
Anyway... in terms of my own journey through the cycles, I'm realizing that I'm at a curious point in my life where things are indeed coming to ends/beginnings. I'm 30, coming down from probably one of the worst years health and sanity wise I've ever had just by itself, and I have been rather ready to be done with my 20s for a while, as though they have brought me many hard earned lessons and blessings, I also regard them as a period of loss... of focus, direction, people, aspects of myself... So this month there is a definite sense of staring ahead into the ether and going "okay... done with x, y and z... now what?" and at the same time being aware that some major chapters in my life are tying up and winding to a close, and... being okay with that in a way that I really would not have been even two weeks ago.
What's next? what is the new year, whenever it may start, going to be like? I have no idea. But I'm optimistic about it for the first time in a very long while, and that's something.
Time to take my meds and put myself to bed, I think. Shower can wait until morning.
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no subject
Date: 2008-10-10 03:37 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-10-10 12:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-10-10 12:59 pm (UTC)The year I turned 30 was the year I met ever member of my current family except Nounsandverbs (who obviously I already knew), and Gryphon_m (who moved here the year that *he* turned 40). In fact, Nounsandverbs and Purpura first met eachother at my 30th birthday party.