It's December 1st. You know what that means.

[kjpepper]

Even in my cynical old age I must say there are two things about the holidays that will never get old. One is seeing what terrifying Technicolor or all white horrors people have inflicted on their houses (to this day, the light up lawn reindeer that move still creep me out/fascinate me). The other is the music. I love Christmas carols and other such holiday ilk. Love them. Love singing them, love parodying them. I am less thrilled about hearing them in stores and on the radio because I dislike the fact that every pop artist has a Christmas album and the versions of the songs are usually pretty damn bad, some exceptions noted, so I keep a running list of classics.

Now like I said, normally I despise Christmas albums, but the people below have manage to record more than one song that I like a lot:

South Park: The best one is "Dreidel" in five part harmony, with other notable mentions being Mr. Mackey's "Carol of the Bells" (Ding Dong, mmmkay) and "It's Hard To Be A Jew On Christmas", but considering Trey and Matt have some impressive musical chops as well as a firm command of gross humor, the blend of the two + the holidays tends to produce funny and repeatably listenable stuff (though maybe not at Grandma's Christmas dinner - I don't think "Merry Fucking Christmas" would go over well at all. Or Cartman's version of "O Holy Night" where he's getting tazed with a cattle prod while singing it.)

Nat King Cole: Clearly "The Christmas Song" wins everything. (Do you remember any of the covers? No? Neither does anyone else.) However, the album of the same name is probably the only actual Christmas album thats worth owning (other than the Nutcracker). Good stuff.

Frank Sinatra: Well clearly Ole Blue Eyes can do no wrong. I love his version of "Jingle Bells." And I waive my rule on Christmas covers for his version of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas." It is less depressing than the Judy Garland version.

Bing Crosby: I'm going to date myself horribly, but did he sing anything BUT? I'm sure he did, but I sure as hell don't remember, he's the guy who sings "White Christmas" and "Silver Bells" (which is still one of my all time favorites). And while "Mele Kalikimaka" makes me kinda roll my eyes a bit, "I'll be Home for Christmas" will always lay me out flat sobbing.

Tchaikovsky - Nutcracker. Giggling aside, the only reason I don't have it yet is that I can't find a recorded version that isn't the Nutcracker Suite, which believe it or not, is somewhat different from the score performed during the actual ballet and the pieces are in a different order. I'm still looking for a well recorded copy of the ballet music.

Random singles I've amassed over the years:

Bobby Helms - Jingle Bell Rock
Jose Feliciano - Feliz Navidad (I really kinda dig the 70s game show feel of this one)
Dar Williams - The Christians and The Pagans
The Pogues - Fairy Tale of New York
Justin Timberlake - Dick in a Box (Yes. I included this. It's Christmas music. Shut up.)
Brenda Lee - Rockin Around the Christmas Tree
Adam Sandler - Chanukah Song (the live concert version is the best one if you can find it)
Lou Monte - Dominic The Italian Christmas Donkey (for some reason this song is BIG in NY during the holidays.
Temptations - Silent Night
Judy Garland - Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas (depressing, but I think this song kinda needs to be.)
Weird Al Yankovic - The Night Santa went Crazy
Vanessa Williams - Do you Hear What I Hear
Eartha Kitt - Santa Baby
Mariah Carey - All I Want For Christmas Is You
Elmo Shropeshire - Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
Elvis Presley - Blue Christmas
Peanuts - Hark the Herald Angels Sing
Transsiberian Orchestra - Christmas Eve Sarajevo
Boston Pops - Sleigh Ride
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart - German Dance No. 3: "The Sleighride" (Not to be confused with "Sleigh Ride.")

And stuff you might not have heard of but very worth hunting down:

mc chris - Evergreen. It's a song about going out and getting wasted on Christmas eve. How can you not love that?

OneUp Mushrooms - Super Mario's Sleigh Ride. One of the best things to ever come out of OCRemix, I think.

Wesley Willis - Merry Christmas. I'm not sure whether to be terrified or amused by the fact that Wesley Willis managed to find mental space in his schizophrenic ramblings to cut a Christmas track, but there it is.

The Twelve Days After Christmas. This song is a piece for chorus/piano, and it's really hard to find a good recorded version. There is one pretty funny version on YouTube here, but the chick's voice is awful to the point of nearly unlistenable, which is a crying shame because other than that it was well done. Her husband in the background is hilarious.

Jonathan Coulton - Podsafe Christmas Song. JoCo should sing with potty mouthed lazy elves more often.

That's a pretty long list. People should add to it.

Comments

[peacockdress.livejournal.com]

Another bizarre yet brilliant moment is Bing singing Little Drummer Boy with David Bowie. Apparently Bing didn't know who that young man was at all, but his daughter liked him, so he said yes. Or something.

[kjpepper.livejournal.com]

forgot about that, lol, that was funny.

[kshandra]

You just made my LIFE for knowing the 12 Days After. I sang that in 7th grade choir, and loved it beyond all reason from the minute we cracked the score.

[masteradept.livejournal.com]

Their is only one Christmas song I really will hear (without a movie singing it)...Another Lonely Christmas by Prince. All of the others I have been done with for years since I was a retail slave.

[padparadscha.livejournal.com]

By god, I just did the same damn thing on my own blog! And shit yeah you know the Eartha Kitt version of "Santa Baby." Nobody else is allowed to sing it.

Oh, Bing. He also does a magnificent "Silent Night."

I much prefer Weird Al's "Christmas At Ground Zero," myself. ("There's no time for last minute shoppin'--it's time to face your final destiny!")

And hellz yeah Super Mario's Sleigh Ride. No collection is complete without it.