This is good news, really.
Jan. 7th, 2009 05:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kjpepperSaw the GI today. Between spanking my digestive tract with the prednisone and the taking of the meds on schedule for the first time in... okay lets admit it, ever, the Crohn's seems to be doing the equivalent of curling up in its little rocket ship, going "I'LL GET YOU NEXT TIME, GADGET. NEXT TIME" and then its cat punctuates that with a singularly sinister sounding yowl.
Aside: why is it that evil masterminds always have cats? Really ugly fuckers, too?
So what's the problem? My problem is that for the first time in four years my body's processing food normally. Hence the sudden 25 lbs weight spike in the last two months. Which means, if I want to get back to and stay at 185, let alone lose a bit more, I have to actually start giving a crap about what I eat. Which I realize, I should be doing anyway, and kinda have started at least paying attention. But on the other hand, arg. Anybody that knows me well knows I have a patent allergy to anything that even vaguely smells like a diet. While I realize it's perfectly possible and reasonable to eat better and still loudly and aggressively mock things like fat free labels, sucralose, Atkins and diet soda with no sense of hypocrisy I'm fairly ashamed to admit that I'm tempted to just go off my meds again because I'm lazy and just want the weight to come off without having to think about it. I'M NOT GONNA DON'T YELL AT ME I KNOW THIS IS STUPID. But that's how I feel. I'm disgusted by that especially since I was quite happy and much healthier last time I was in 230sville. Where the fuck is this weight freakout coming from?
Also, I am in one hell of a Mood today, which is not only fucking with my headnoise, but is fairly annoying because I can't pin it to a specific cause. Just imagine Eben at "full sulk" and you'll have an idea of what my state of mind is. Fair warning, especially since I fully plan on exacerbating said Mood with Red Hot Chili Peppers (the slower stuff), Eliott Smith and Jeff Buckley as soon as I finish this entry.
Aside: why is it that evil masterminds always have cats? Really ugly fuckers, too?
So what's the problem? My problem is that for the first time in four years my body's processing food normally. Hence the sudden 25 lbs weight spike in the last two months. Which means, if I want to get back to and stay at 185, let alone lose a bit more, I have to actually start giving a crap about what I eat. Which I realize, I should be doing anyway, and kinda have started at least paying attention. But on the other hand, arg. Anybody that knows me well knows I have a patent allergy to anything that even vaguely smells like a diet. While I realize it's perfectly possible and reasonable to eat better and still loudly and aggressively mock things like fat free labels, sucralose, Atkins and diet soda with no sense of hypocrisy I'm fairly ashamed to admit that I'm tempted to just go off my meds again because I'm lazy and just want the weight to come off without having to think about it. I'M NOT GONNA DON'T YELL AT ME I KNOW THIS IS STUPID. But that's how I feel. I'm disgusted by that especially since I was quite happy and much healthier last time I was in 230sville. Where the fuck is this weight freakout coming from?
Also, I am in one hell of a Mood today, which is not only fucking with my headnoise, but is fairly annoying because I can't pin it to a specific cause. Just imagine Eben at "full sulk" and you'll have an idea of what my state of mind is. Fair warning, especially since I fully plan on exacerbating said Mood with Red Hot Chili Peppers (the slower stuff), Eliott Smith and Jeff Buckley as soon as I finish this entry.
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no subject
Date: 2009-01-08 02:10 pm (UTC)I hear you on the diet = evil thing. I don't want to deny myself, screw that noise! And yet I need to lose weight as I'm more fully realizing that this is the one body I've got, so I need to do little stuff to point me that way. Not a whole hog (mmm...bacon) change, but little stuff I can do more of as time goes by. I'm eating more veggies. Less sweet stuff. Have resisted the siren song of a quick Coke for a couple of weeks now. Bought a giant thing of salad stuff, so now feel obligated to make it part of dinner.
Little stuff. Nobody said eating better should be full of Nazi.
If you've got that mildly ancy, nigh-pissy thing going on, it's going around. Probably the Mercury retrograde dog days, is my guess. :/