*deep breath*

So, being the resident computer nerd of the family I was immediately given an assignment - namely book airlines for various and sundry. Like my 89 year old Gramma. *facepalm* you try getting a querelous old lady on an afternoon flight at the last possible minute. Thank goodness for bereavement discounts (and thank you beatgoddess for reminding me such things existed.)

Mom is so still around. Or was a few hours ago, I don't know if she is still. But at some point when I was wrangling with two of my sisters credit cards, a fading cell signal, a dodgy dialup connection all while trying to book a flight something that felt a whole lot like her hugged me real tight, the same way she used to hug me when I used to cry about getting my feeling hurt by whomever. *sigh*

There's a pic that my cousin copied for the collage that I think they're going to use for the big funeral photo that was taken OMG years ago at my oldest sister's wedding - consensus is that it's the best picture of her, but I'm going to ask for a copy. Somehow I'd forgetten that Mom had a slight dimple in her left cheek. It's really fucking scary how much I look like her. There are some pics of her in her mid 20s... yeah.

I've never seen my dad cry before today. Still kinda processing that.

But overall point of today - booking air travel bites my cooter.

I promised various people I was going to sleep tonight, and I will. *decisive nod* especially since the house seems willing to permit it now. Tomorrow I'm assuming is just more of teh crazy, but I'll have to find a little time to slip off to Lane Bryant and get a nice blouse to compliment my sailor pants. *facepalm* serves me right, being all goth and shit - wardrobe full of black clothing and STILL nothing appropriate for a funeral. *snrrrk*

Thanks for all the lovin's and messages and everything, guys, you don't know how helpful its been. You're the best. *kisses for all and sundry*

It goes, one hectic day at a time.

sooooo the next stop in how the geek can help with funeral stuff - I'm now in charge of the Mom collage, etc. Basically later today I have to run to Kinko's, and do some mad photoshopping. Luckily I know exactly what I want to do, so it should take too long, but man, am I hurting for the trappings of nerditude back home. Not to mention the broadband connection. Jeezopete, I don't remember dialup ever being this goddamn slow.

This morning I was emailing directions to the funeral to Dad's frat brothers. *facepalm* Yes, you read me right, Dad, who is pushing 80 quick fast and in a hurry, is still quite active in his chapter of Omega Psi Phi. Nothing like a bunch of doddery old men trying to recapture their youth. I can just imagine the step show. *snrrk* kinda waving around a little bit in walkers or somethin'.

I did have a little bit of a moment when I was standing in front of Mom's Yamaha concert grand in the front hallway of the house. Damn she loved that piano, she would have something cooking for hours in the kitchen and while she waited she would sit and play through showtunes, classical, gospel, popular stuff, country, and sing along with herself. That piano would reverberate all the way down the block, I swear, and all the way upstairs, but she sometimes would sit and play from 3 in the afternoon until 11 at night, her arthritis be damned. And she was so happy doing it too...

The sad part isn't really that she won't ever do that again, although that fact did have me quite teary earlier. The sad part is that no one else knows how to play piano. Except for me, and I'm severely out of practice and even if I was... I was never that good, you know? That's something I always kinda wish I'd kept up with. Now more than ever. It's so fucked up, I'd always joke about how I was probably going to wind up in charge of Mom's piano if/when she died, because I was the only one besides her that really gave a damn about it, not to mention could play something besides "Chopsticks" or "Heart and Soul." The reality of that joke is a wee bit more sobering. I don't think I even know where the key to open it is. Something to look for later.

curious - are you guys okay with me venting funeral stuff? or should I make a filter? Just wondering... I haven't bothered locking these, really, but... I do know how disconcerting reading about someone else dealing with a death is. Lemme know.