kjpepper: (batshit tenna (talk to spooky))
[personal profile] kjpepper
Yours Anally - Get inside someone sweet
Chocolate Lovers - Do you like Chocolate?


Okay, the juxtaposition of these two is just plain sick and wrong.

Fwd: baldPousay - Pousay? Yo, what's up pouSAY? Coming to a street corner near you.

Could you pfizer? - Ah the verbing of the drug company that brought us Viagra. What does this mean, though? hmm...
pfi•zer('fi-zer) intransitive verb -ered; -er•ing :the act of chemically correcting erectile dysfunction.
Super Size your weiner - for only 99 cents extra. Includes fries and a soft drink.

5 mature dvds for only 1 buck - so... a mature DVD is one that's sat on the shelf in the cellophane for a few years? Upon opening, does it reveal a fuller, richer, better movie? Hmm. Hollywood would love that. Hell, Gigli would be Oscar material in a decade...

EverWantedT0 make her say "0h my god itsbig" - Nah, people already say that about my ass all the time.

Achieve massive size down under - Listen, mate, I don't think the Australians care about your size any more than those of us up here in the northern hemisphere. I mean, I'm sure if Steve Irwin wanted to do a Croc Hunter Special on the Playboy Channel... "Crikey, what a large naughty bugger this is!"

Eat a prime young cunt - I've often wondered if there was a rating system for female plumbing. What would exactly constitute grade A Prime Cunt? *whistles Hoe Down‡*

Sizzling Man Luv Vdds - A badly written personal ad, perhaps? "Sizzling Man, brown/brown H/W Prop. Seeks same for LTR and VDDS." Of course, then you have to wonder what exactly VDDS stands for... Very Dangerous Drunken Sumo?

They will do everything with every hole! - Okay, I deeply resented it when golf, probably the most boring sport on the face of the planet, got its own cable channel. Now it's invading my junk mail. *whine*


Hoe Down is a piece in the Rodeo ballet suite by Aaron Copland. It's more popularly known as "Beef: It's what's for dinner."

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