Temet Nosce

The work, it seems, never really ends.

I had one of those conversations with timarok last night that you turn over in your mind for hours thereafter. It's like playing with a rubik's cube, really, you sit and you twist, and if you have the knack for it, solve it, and if you don't either things get more convoluted or if you're like me, you get to a certain point and stall. (I will solve it someday, I will...)

I don't know - his worldview's a little skewed here and there but if you can sort of work your mind around his paradigm every so often he makes a certain amount of sense.

I feel like I started out knowing who the hell I was when I was younger, and then friggin' college broke me. Or did it? Maybe it just exascerbated problems I didn't really know were there before. Anyway the point is, since 2000, with the aid of friends who demand no less than total honesty with self and others I've been kinda doing a system evaluation - slowly figuring out what the hell's going on with my hardware, how I work, what's somehow stopped working over time, what never worked in the first place. Mostly because I wanted to be like gossamer_gull: "You can say what you want about me but you can't say that I don't know myself." I think what I figured out last night is that I think I'm done with the eval stage finally. Maybe I've been done with it for a while. I don't really know. But at any rate... definitely time at this point to defrag and upgrade and actually fix the shit that's wrong.

Gotta go. Mmmm, digestive upset cha cha, gotta love it.

*sleepy blink*

First, teh silly:

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...???

...ever find yourself in an institutional bathroom, staring at the randomly patterned tile floor, trying to make sense of the placement of these little 1" squares? Ever wonder if somehow if you plotted all those squares into a grid of some sort you'd start seeing patterns or satanic images? kinda like what happens when you're bored and for shits and giggles start playing classic rock LPs backwards?

Or maybe that's just me and I'm just tired. I was up obscenely late last night working on my draft and getting sucked in by TBS - first by the end of Pretty in Pink (is anyone else with me on the fact that the pink prom dress Molly Ringwald's character makes at the end of the movie is HIDEOUS even by 80s standards?? And I'm not even in the camp of people that believe redheads shouldn't be wearing pink in the first place... I mean, it would have been acceptable (barely) had it been tailored through the waist rather than hanging like a potato sack.) and then the Keanu Reeves/Charlize Theron version of Sweet November. Now there is one schmaltzy movie, even without the gratuitous Enya (though I do like "Only Time" a lot... It had it's cute moments, but... *sigh* if only Keanu could act as well as look pretty... Every time he looks at the camera I want to yell "Duuuuuude."

General agenda for the rest of tonight - finish up the stupid paper draft (due at 8pm). I'm starting to get to the stage where I start singing the Fuckit Hat Dance, so I'd better finish it now so that I can get something coherent out of it before I completely lose interest. Take out trash, trudge back to Smith, hand draft in, stop by engineering lab, see if I can yoink some function sets off of the compys there that I need to use, come home, cornroe the hair, go to sleep at some hour BEFORE 3am, get up tamara and BRAID THE FRO. Still haven't had a chance to invest in some blue toned yarn, so I think I'm going to go with solid burgundy again this time, though I'm intrigued by Birkwelch's idea of the solid black and that I do have...

Anyway. Some nibbles, and then this is me, buckling down.

Man am I hurting for caffiene.

Ugh, finally!

Ah the interview meme! I like this one, it's fun.

from denonymous:

( 5 questions )

Want to play?
Here's how it works:
1 - Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2 - I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3 - You'll update your journal with my five questions, and your five answers.
4 - You'll include this explanation.
5 - You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed.

In other news, done with the draft! *happy dance* It's still nowhere near completed paper, but at least now it's more or less coherent and doesn't quite read like I wrote it over three nights of being half asleep (even though that pretty much sums up the circumstances...)

I've actually been done since about 3:30 - I've just been doing general computer fucking around since I finished. Watched both Shrek 2 trailers and luxuriated in being able to giggle like a fool without anyone in the house to hear me.

I should probably print this thing and get me arse down to Seelye and turn it in. I might skip the library in favor of a nap before I have to work my orange chicken mojo for the Casita tonight.

How the hell did I get this peanut butter smudge across my pants? ew?